Europe: London Day 2

So far, we woke up around 8 am after I was not able to sleep all night. Got ready, ate breakfast and checked out of our room. We were instructed that in order to get to Russell square, we would need to take the Piccadilly line metro. We get to the station and purchase our tickets. As soon as I go through, Aff and her bag get stuck in the entrance and I fall trying to pick up my bags over the stairs. Already a bad morning and it's not even noon. Sitting on the metro, we realize how far we are from our destination. I already hate London.

Europe, Day One: London

After a long flight, we land in London, only to already hate London. $170 converts to 100 pounds, ridiculous. We also find out how cold London really is and that we should have probably packed more winter clothes. Cab was already 25 pounds for a 15 minute ride. Fuse was out in our hotel room so it took us forever to get it working again. Hopefully tomorrow will be better! Good night!

Living in a Fairytale

I really do think I live in a fairytale. Everything that happens is just a scene in my fairytale. I want those fairytale endings, I believe everything works out in the end. But the end is getting closer and I'm getting older... when does my fairytale come together?

I think that's where I think too much, I just always want everything to be perfect, but I don't realize that not everything is perfect. If everything was perfect, there would be no excitement.

I think I've been learning a lot about myself lately. A lot about what I want, who I want to be, where I see myself in the future...

I just need to stop thinking so much. But it's hard to stop when that's all you've ever done.

...

I had a dream you missed me. I wish it were true.

The stress is eating me alive.

I'm really, really busy... all the time... which is making me really, really stressed. Just everything is so stressful. Living arrangements, my internship, work, school, family, relationships... everything. Nothing is just not stressful and something I look forward to. I swear I'm going to die of a heart attack before I'm even 25. I'm too young to be this stressed. I NEED TO leave Georgia! I feel like this place is the cause of all my stress. I need to leave and go to a remote island for atleast a year and not have any communication with anyone. Maybe change my name, dye my hair, get surgery... just start a new life. I really, really need to relieve my stress. Can someone just make SOMETHING better? Just one thing out of the six I mentioned. Anything. Please?

Yay?

So, it's officially my birthday, and I'm writing in this.

I really wanted to celebrate it, but its MY birthday. Is it selfish of me to think that someone would care to go out of their way to try to make it special for me? Especially since my 21st birthday sucked. I don't want to make any effort, yet, it's me making it. I just feel alone, like I have no one. I don't know what I want. I'm just unsatisfied with everything going on in my life. I need to move, I need to leave Georgia, I need to go somewhere where I can figure out who I am. I'm not happy. I just need to finish school first so I have nothing holding me back in Georgia. I hate it here. I hate not being close to anyone anymore.

Yay, Happy 22nd birthday to me.

I really don't like putting titles on these.

 ‎"The whole point of love, is to put someone elses needs above yours."

I just don't understand why this concept is so hard to grasp. Isn't love about sacrifice? Isn't love about giving up something you love doing, because the person you're with means more to you than anything else? Isn't it about doing things you love with the person you love and sharing this passion? I just want someone to share this passion with me. 

I don't know what I'm doing for my birthday yet... the one person I want to spend it with doesn't want to spend it with me. I'm just in this place in my life where I don't see my life going anywhere. I'm ready to progress, but it doesn't seem like that's what life has in store for me. I don't know what God wants me to do right now. I don't like where I am...